oh the weather outside is frightful....

but - that shouldn't keep me from WalMart.....

Ahhhhh.... the weather. Winter Storm 2005. Milk and bread supplies are completely depleted at WalMart, trust me I've been. Surprisingly, not to many people buying - just a lot of people walking around with that, "I am so glad we got out of the house or I might have committed murder," look on their face. For me? I rambled through the craft section and then picked up a puzzle (100 piece) for the girls. Apparently, they loved the idea, but not the actual concept of putting it together. Currently, all 100 pieces are scattered about the dining room table... and, I think the dog is eating one or two right now.

What happened to the ice storms when we were little? My girls are so spoiled! CD's, DVD's, video games, brand name clothing, and now.... ice storms complete with power on. WHAT? When I was little, I distinctly remember there being NO power for several days at a time... my mom and dad would cook on the big kerosene heater in the kitchen... yes, politically incorrect. No hot shower for a couple of days - and sleeping under lots of blankets. The girls? They have no idea what that's like... watched movies all day and played dress up. The power is blinking off and on now - SB looks a little concerned when I tell her there may be no lights later.... yes, darling, that means no tv as well.

These kind of days, much like my friend Malia's, are my favorites. We stayed in our PJ's till after noon, and have just been hanging out together.... well, sort of. Sarah Beth went outside at least a couple of times to investigate the ice... breaking off iceicles and measuring how thick the ice on the ground is... Jordin has been playing dress up most of the day... listening to the Walkman and dancing around in her own little world. She made a "hula skirt" out of construction paper, that surprisingly has lasted, despite her constant state of ballet, around her waist for a couple of hours. My dad made an amazing pound cake... and, I don't think hot dogs for lunch have ever tasted better.... something about the cold weather and ice makes all that unhealthy stuff taste good. My mom and I have been working on our scrapbook projects most of the day, and I have been reading my latest book off and on. I am sure by tomorrow we'll be ready to strangle one another with cabin fever... but for now, I am ok with a little family time.

Everyone needs a little sometime..... right?

If not, there's always a trip to WalMart.

Rachael

winter storm 2005
What in the world makes people rush out at even the slightest threat of bad weather for milk and bread? What do you people plan on doing... making milk sandwiches for the next 48 hours?

the adventure continues
(aka... are we DONE yet?)

Thinking I was the world's most wonderful mommy,
I decided to "reward" my children's good behavior with a trip to the movies... ( dear God, Dr. Spock fans, calm down... I don't do it often) I mean, it was "early release" day from school - and I was forced to fill up an afternoon with something besides whining, moaning, and pestering.... yes, I am still getting used to being a full time mommy. It's true, I admit. After all, the girls have been fabulous lately - and I had a few extra dollars to spend on US.... mind you, after this, all few extra dollars would be completely diminished.

So. I come home, make the girls pee as soon as we walk in the door of the house ( you know, BEFORE they actually wet the floor because they try to "hold it" all day... don't ask me why) and send them out to play in the beautiful weather. I check the movie times - and am excited to see that "Are we there yet," is playing at 3:15 at the local (and I do mean local - it's five minutes away) theater!

Damn, I am good - not only are we going to the theater five minutes away (no CHANCE of being late) but - also - we're getting the matinee price!! YAHOO! Only $5.00 to get in to a movie I would otherwise never THINK of seeing. Plenty of time to go by the gas station and pick up the normal priced candy and drinks for smuggling in.... hey - you know, when you charge $4.00 for candy - smuggling is the only answer. I am glad I can teach my girls honesty at such an early age.

So - twenty minutes before said show time - I call the girls inside.
@*(#@*!!
Jordin has on ONE tennis shoe, no socks (meaning that at some point, BOTH shoes have been removed) mud up to her calves, and dirt all over her face.... what has the child been doing, digging a hole to China? I am not sure. So - clean her up. Just in case you don't know, Jordin is, quite possibly - the world's slowest moving child. Now, we are more like eight minutes till show time. Ditch the gas station idea... (Ok Ok God - I got it... stop being dishonest with the movie smuggling... fine....)

Off we rush. I mean, I don't really feel normal if we're not rushing everywhere, so - I am sure that was just God again, trying to make sure I felt normal instead of weird about being somewhere early. Right? Buy the $5 movie tickets, and head inside to begrudingly buy movie theater popcorn and candy. $4.75 per kid for the kids combo - popcorn, drink and candy of their own... really, honestly, not a bad deal for the price. Ok, we'll take that. The lady behind the counter must not have kids. I am sure of this. Because, after preparing said snacks - she informs us that today, they don't have candy for the kids - it's cookies instead. Sarah Beth shoots me a death look - and I quickly reassure her... don't worry, it'll be great! Thinking the cookies are of course, something BESIDES the $.50 pack of animal crackers she is putting with their snacks.

More of the death look from SB. Then, Jordin sends same look.

Guilty mommy syndrome is now in full swing.

So, I buy a $3.25 bag of candy to share. The girls are happy -and, after spending $24.00 on just snacks and drinks - I need some medication. We head off to the theater. SB speaks to some friends from school, and we find our seats. I decide I really would like butter on my popcorn, despite promised better health habits... so, since the movie is late getting started (could have saved me some of that $24.00 ) we go back out for butter.

At this point, I had already made the observation that Jordin was doing an unusually good job at being graceful. I mean, the norm for the child is to spill, trip, twirl, or collapse into something... but, she made it all the way to her seat with that whole snack tray setup. I am content... smiling, actually - and heading for artificial butter. Then, behind me... I hear the sound of spilling popcorn.... alas, Jordin. The sound of spilling popcorn, by the way, is closely related to the sound of change being flushed down the toilet.

I share my popcorn (the only thing that prevented complete meltdown) with Jordin. She, however, is actually quite happy with the $.50 Animal Crackers we were able to retrieve from the popcorn fiasco. So, Jordin ate the $4.75 Animal Crackers, shared popcorn with me, and wiggled for the rest of the 1.5 hour movie.

SB laughed so hard she fell out of her seat. No joke - it's really possible. She's graceful like that. Jordin laughed so hard I was sure that she was either a.) going to wet her pants, or b.) going to shoot animal crackers out her nose. I laughed at them. Didn't laugh at the movie.

Want to hear my review of "Are we There Yet?".... don't waste your $5.00. Save it for the upcoming treats - like Robitica... or something like that. However, if you would like to spend an excess amount of extra money, pick up spilled popcorn off the floor, pray your nose doesn't get broken in the movie theater bathroom - or, see your kids laugh so hard they cry - spend the money.... it was worth it.

Rachael

blogs of note
blogging... your very own fifteen minutes of fame....
a little voyuerism you can't be arrested for.... (oh, my - did that just come out of my mouth?)

some links to my own personal friends, and their lives (as seen through your monitor)

• Becky's Blog... Diaries of a Scrapbooker
• Malia's Blog... Hopeful Perfect Wife
• Kelly's Blog.... Useless Chatter
• Queen Peach's Blog (aka Christy, but let's just call her the Queen)

Enjoy everyone!

Rachael

mommy moment...
(much to the dismay of my children)

Ever just have "one of those" days?

You know... the kind when everything could go a little better... when the world could possibly find some small way to throw you a bone, and just doesn't? The kind when you want to wail, resembling any preschooler you know... "it's not faaaiiiirrr!"

Grits in your hair, stain on your brand new white shirt, forgotten bookbags, lost lunch money, who knows where the shoes are kind of a day.

Yep.

So, this morning - I am busily getting Jordin ready for "FairyTale Day" at her preschool .... frantically searching through every leotard, feather boa, and tutu we have - Sarah Beth finally gets frustrated and asks her Grandad for a ride to school ( I mean, the child begins to sweat if she's not there at least twenty minutes before the bell rings....). I try patiently to explain to Jordin that while she would be adorable... she just can't wear ballet tights and leotard outside in January... could we wear something else? Perhaps this? Jordin looks a little skeptical at the idea of my own personal Tinkerbell creation... but she gives in.... .

On go the pink pants, the pink long sleeved leotard..... the white lacy socks, the pink strapovers.... out come the dress-up wings and tiara.... Jordin begins to look a little more interested in the idea .... she's feeling Mommy's Tinkerbell groove.... curl her hair, spray it with glitter hairspray (it's ok that is takes four washes to get it out... it's Fairy Tale day, after all....) Apply some blush and mascara - some glitter eyeshadow... and finally - the crowning moment - placing her pink feather Tiara on her head.

Jordin is elated.

She does look like a punk rock version of Tinkerbell, and I am ok with that.

Rush to school to make it by 8AM.....

Walk into the classroom - Jordin beaming ....

Realize no other kids are dressed up.... and dress up day isn't till Friday.


Oops.


Rachael

Tuesday.

• Wake up at 5AM and realize how warm and cozy bed is.... especially when not sharing it with anyone under the age of eight.
• 6:30 AM - Phone rings... "please, Ms. Fletcher, we love it so much when you come to our school, grace us with your lofty presence and subsitute teach today..." (ok, ok, maybe it didn't happent EXACTLY like that... but you get the idea...)
• 6:35 AM - Begrudgingly roll out of bed and walk upstairs, half blind and desperate for coffee.
• 6:40 AM - Shower.
• 6:50 AM - Wake up girls, twenty minutes later than usual... this causing the anal retentive Sarah Beth to insist she was right about wanting to set the alarm clock last night... she just KNEW I would MAKE US late!! Realize she is a complete drama queen, and move on.
• 7:10 AM - Serve Eggo waffles for breakfast.
• 7:30 AM - Kiss girls goodbye... they catch a ride with "pa" to school on the mornings I work.
• 7:31 AM - Listen to quiet sound in house.
• 7:32 AM - Cut on radios and TV because quiet sound bothers me.
• 8:00AM - Arrive at middle school
• 8:30 AM - Receive warning from other teacher about seventh period class.
• 8:50 AM - First period.... why can't middle schoolers come to class with what they need for the day? Why?
• 9:50 AM - Second period... I wonder how many kids will ask me how tall I am today.... go ahead and write height on the board under my name.
• 11:06 AM - Take 25 middle schoolers down the hall to lunch. Attention moms of middle schoolers - I am so glad I don't have to take these children anywhere but down the hall.
• 11:31 AM - Prepare to leave lunchroom after digesting meal that contains all calories needed by me for entire DAY. Oops.
• 12:00 PM - Free periods arrive! Catch up with high school friends who are now teachers.
• 1:00 PM - Hallway monitor. Once again, Attention mothers.... I am so glad these aren't MY kids.... :-)
• 1:10 PM - Praised by fellow teacher for having very "positive attitude" (ahem - please see 1:00 PM activity)
• 3:00 PM - Dreaded seventh period arrives. After several thoughts regarding making their lives miserable, realize they are funny kids. How tall am I? READ THE BOARD!
• WHY CAN'T MIDDLE SCHOOLERS COME TO CLASS WITH PEN AND PAPER?
• 3:55 PM - Tell sweet little cherubs goodbye for the day. Promise to retun.
• 4:15 PM - Pray that I'll make it to SB's school while all the while IGRNORING the "empty" gas sign...
• 4:20 PM - Pick up SB
• 4:25 PM - Praying begins again. Dear God, at least to the gas station... if you don't mind, that is....
• 4:35 PM - Bring SB home and listen to her read for thirty minutes.
• 5:00 PM - Fall asleep.
• 5:45 PM - Wake up, realize must pick up Jordin from dance....
• 5:55 PM - put gas in car (note: thanks for answered prayers)
• 6:05 PM - pick up Jordin from dance.... retrieve child from costume closet.
• 6:25 PM - Drop Jordin off at Mimi's house
• 6:50 PM - Arrive at Bible study
• 9:00 PM - Arrive home ... hear message that tomorrow is Fairy Tale Day at J's school.
• 10:20 PM - finish blog so we can sleep... and find Fairy Tale costume.

Sigh....
Well.... earlier today, if you could have been here for the thirty milliseconds it was posted... I had a great post. A really great one. One that would have certainly gained the attention of bloggers everywhere... the kids were gone - and it was just me, my mind, and the keyboard - highly combustible when mixed together. What happened to said post? I am really not sure. Some sort of bull@&#*@ about an "internal server error." Yay. Internal server error crashes my complete masterpiece.

What did I post about?

What was so wonderful that I am now posting about how wonderful it was?

Silence.

That's right... silence. Beautiful, blissful silence. Silence in the complete sense.... the kind of silence that you can hear... the kind that you can feel - the kind that makes your head swim with all kinds of thoughts that you never have when always engaged in conversation with the preschool set. Silence that overwhelms you... silence that makes you sit and just enjoy being still. That is what I posted about. It was amazing.

I sat here and blogged away for at least forty-five minutes, talking about my adventures today and how the only sound I could hear was the sound of my fingers hitting the keyboard. How it was so wonderful to post and not be breaking up arguments, dividing My Little Ponies, or redressing Barbie. I didn't have to answer any homework questions, find any missing socks, or decide whose turn it was to pick the afternoon tv show. It was just silent. My creative juices surfaced and flowed ... and flowed and flowed.

Until I realized that perhaps silence can become too much of a good thing. Until I became a little nervous that the keyboard sound was the only thing I could hear, and that actually hearing myself think for once was a little overrated. So, I put down the blog and found a Barbie to dress.... she looked a little lonely.

Rachael

Reception and Open House cards 

Inside wording for the invitation 

The inside of the invitation... too bad the tissue looks crooked... oops! The tissue is a beautiful handmade paper... :-)  

This is the outside of the invitation I designed. 

Wedding Weekend
Wedding, wedding and more wedding.

Calm down, dear reader, I don't mean me.

That would be like asking, if I said I felt yucky... "Do you think you're pregnant?"
"No," I reply sweetly, "no chance in HELL of that."

The plans continue for the wedding of my (sort of) sister, Natsuki Oku - from Japan. She's coming here to get married at the end of Feb., so my dad can give her away. Naturally, this means my mom and I running around town and the general vincinity like chickens with our heads cut off.... Saturday morning we returned to the paper store to pick up envelopes for the invites that I designed... paper for the programs and guest cards, her wedding album, and other miscellaneous things that every wedding can't be without. I have become like the movie, "The Wedding Planner," - always involved with weddings, but never getting married... much less falling in love.

Oh, I'm sorry... that was my other personality - the one I like to call "very-bitter-about-still-being-single Rachael". She's a real bitch.

So... here are pictures of the invitation... enjoy.

Is this really my weekend off?

THINGS TO DO ... SATURDAY EDITION

• Mail all mail not mailed this week (see below)
• Find receipt and return too small pants
• Drop off girls... 10AM to Jim for overnight
• Tell someone I won't be at church on Sunday (catering job, $$)
• Buy red shirt for Sunday job
• Buy envelopes for invitations I designed
• Buy ribbon for invites
• Assemble
• Get mailing list from mom and address
• Find out if LOVE stamps are out yet
• VACCUM CAR!!!
• reorganize girls closet (it's scary right now)
• mail ebay auctions
• finish painting in dining room
• find out when dad can rent floor sander and buffer
• sleep
• eat
  

... sometimes, life is grand.

After leaving SB to finish her movie upstairs... took Jordin down for bed early - she misses her daddy tonight (even though we'll see him bright and early tomorrow morning) .... fell asleep while tucking Jordin in ... woke up to find SB curled up in my bed... on my side - under my blanket... :-) And even though it's mine - it looks more snuggly wrapped around her.

Sweet dreams.

Rachael

A few of my favorite things.... from today....

Jordin: Eww... I am not having brussel sprouts... I hate brussel sprouts. (please, keep in mind - the child has never come close to or thought about the brussel sprout as a food previous to tonight's dinner....)
Me: Jordin, these aren't brussel sprouts, (lying embellishing truth to my advantage) these are little, tiny, baby cabbages.
Jordin: (Perplexed look... as if to say - damn, mommy - you got me on this one... I thought you said Brussel Sprouts....)
Me: So, I think we can try these sweet little baby cabbages, don't you?
(twenty minutes later, as Jordin scrapes her plate clean....)
Jordin: Mom, I loved the baby cabbages... yummy! But, I still hate brussel sprouts, ok?

(note : the same above tactic applies to eating salmon as well... at our house, it's known as "Jonah's Whale Tale".... must be something about biblical refferal and food.....)

Me: (snuggling up to Sarah Beth at bedtime) What was happening on the movie you were watching?
SB: Oh, they were playing bonopoly.
Me: You mean, monopoly.
SB: No, bonopoly mom... say it the right way.

By the way, dear reader.... I love it that people think my children are adorable. I really, really do. Take today - as a matter of fact - I am teaching at the middle school again where dear friend from high school is a teacher.... mind you, dear single friend who has never been married or thought about having children friend from high school.... the inevitable, "So, Rach - what are you doing later? You should meet us at (insert local restaurant name here) for dinner! Wouldn't that be GREAT?"

(alas - I begin to ponder the mechanics of getting myself and two fabulously tired children ready for dinner out.... )

"Friend," I say - "I would love to do that... I just don't think the girls would be up for it... "
"Oh, don't be SILLY... " she says, " just bring them... your girls are just so precious!"

(oh dear me)

Yes... precious. They are certainly that. I can imagine how fun excruciating that would be... my two overly tired children in a sit down restaurant surrounded by single people who have no children of their own. Oh yes, very entertaining!

And, as she rambles through and about the wonderful times we are bound to have together, I begin to ponder the "precious" value of my children at dinner.

• Mom, she's touching my napkin.
• Mom, can I have chocolate milk with dinner?
• I don't waaaannnnt thaaaat... I waaannnnnt thhhiisssss.....
• Whhhhhhy cannnn't I haaaaaaave thaaaaat?
• Well, SHE got it!
• Why don't I have a red crayon?
• I dropped my napkin again!
• Mommy, why does the girls bathroom have all boys in it?
• Mommy, why do boys stand up to pee?
• Mommy, can you button my pants?
• Oh, I forgot to wash my hands.... sorry
• Mommy, where is our food?
• Mommy, what are you talking about?

Yes. That would certainly be the epitomy of pleasure. Note to everyone, the Fletchers dine at home most frequently for reasons left mentioned above. Please add this to the list of "please-don't-purchase-that-sticky-gooey-toy-that-makes-alot-of-noise-for-the-Fletchers either.

Thanks!
rach

YUCK, really?

You Are 31 Years Old

31 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

THE TO DO LIST ...continued
(these are from Monday's list)
Return the too big pants... buy new fitting pants. (um... where is the ^&!@^!& receipt?)
Finish my new book.... My Antonia....
Blog
Laundry
finish bible study homework

and now, the new stuff

• mail IRS form
• mail student loan form
• mail postcard invitations to scrapbook party
• check in with "singles" to make sure we're on for this weekend
• balance checkbook
• fill out SB's reading sheet
• find out if SB can still buy a yearbook

ARGGG! Why is so much stuff left over!!??

Rachael

...and one more thing....

... and this is important. Maybe the most important thing you will read today.

(there is a link below - you just have to read through my fluff for a while to get to the point, ok? Do me just this one favor. )

I have a lot of politically minded friends... :0) To my admiration and surprise, some of them you couldn't have paid me to believe they would ever be so... (ahem... Kelly... :-) ) I get emails every day from friends (and oh yes, my former MIL) directing me to their latest find - the latest bit of information or news... all of which I read and remain grateful for receiving... you can't be and educated citizen - or responsible voter - without knowing as much as you can take in - from all the angles.

So... I'll just tell you. I am about as conservative Republican as they come. I don't know how this happened - my dad is as flaming southern Democrat as they come. (This makes for much discussion during dinnertimes and election years) I am a supporter of our President (W) and, most importantly, supportive of our troops overseas right now. I have a dear, dear friend who is there - waiting ever so patiently to come home to his wife, new son, and children - and even he has shared with me the importance of knowing that America is behind him.

However, as you read the following - put your political beliefs aside for the time being. Democrat, Republican, Kerry, Bush - whatever... just take a deep breath and take in what you are about to read. I found the link to this blog on another friend's site.... the link title caught my eye - and, being a selfish American - I went right to it, thinking I would find the online journals of an AMERICAN family in Baghdad... what fun it would be to read about their adventures. What I found was quite the opposite. These are the journals of a mother and her sons... currently voluntarily displaced from their home, traveling the middle East and Europe as they wait for safety in thier hometown. The mother, Faiza, is the main writer - (though you can link to her college age sons sites as well.) A mother who has sent her boys from their home to college - specifically away from Baghdad. Their lives have been rocked by explosions, gunfire, casualties, and strife. These are her journals as she travels, as she worries about the upcoming elections in Iraq, and as she longs for home. They are a middle class family - with the father owning his own company - three sons - and Faiza - who seems very well spoken and much more educated than I.

I found it tearjerking - imagining my comfy life here in the states... insulted to think that this would never happen here or to me. Imagining sending my girls to far away foreign lands - keeping them from the familiarities of home. Faiza misses the simple things - dinnertimes, the market, her neighbors... and says, much to my surprise - that many Baghdad natives have left home, spreading themselves throughout the middle East and Europe - waiting to come home.

What did I find most intriguing? The things, as an American - I had never thought about. Imagine an election in your country for the FIRST time.... the division felt between the two religious groups there - the Sunni and the Shi'aats. Also - the fact that I have NEVER ever, had to even imagine leaving my home... my Kroger, my Target... even my street. And, that as I read, I found no hatred of Americans as a people - but a sadness of a country occupied, a country that, despite it's occupation, longs for true democracy.

Did it change my support of our acitvites there? I am not sure. My new hope is that we, as Americans, will be able to offer TRUE democracy to Iraq - and allow the kind of peace that will allow Faiza to return.... HOME.

A Family in Baghdad

Rachael

And the week goes on....
Been substitute teaching all week at the middle school... missing out on what goes on in the rest of the world... as I am locked away between the hours of 8 and 4. I love it, though - and the kids seem to like me, which is nice.... amazing what a few BlowPops in your purse can do for you with middle schoolers.

"Oh.... you're one of those subs that is actually going to make us DO our work...?"

(Yep, that's me... Ms. Fletcher.... the model of discipline and good behavior....)

"Cool."

My favorite question from the week....

"How tall ARE you?"

...and by telling them how tall I actually am -and watching their eyes glance to the floor to see if I have on heels.... I have gained a few "lofty" friends - you know, the girls who were just like me in the sixth grade... tall. They find me during their lunch period or locker breaks for a quick smile and a hug...

My favorite quote to them.... "yes (insert name here) carry that book around... you'll really look intelligent... impress all the ladies....whoa - actually read it and who knows what will happen?"

After having been there most of last week, I realize that there is almost nothing as fun as walking through the hallways to "Hey! Ms. Fletcher! Are you gonna be our sub today?" Or, spending my "free" period in the libary yesterday, reading a book - and being bombarded by the sixth grade English class that I taught last week - all wanting my opinion on the books they were checking out.... they left with my personal favorites.... (insert pat on the back here... what a feeling....)

However - working all week means many, many things are left undone... laundry, cleaning... the car is making desperate cries from under all the "stuff" to be cleaned, and - I think there is at least $135 worth of dance recital costumes that were supposed to be hung up as soon as I brought them home... um, a week or so ago.

Hope you all are managing well this week! :-)

Rachael

To DO List for MONDAY

• Return the too big pants... buy new fitting pants.
• Check with Dad about upcoming weekend schedule.
• Take Jordin to dance rehersal at 10 AM
• Stay for Parents meeting at 10 AM
• Help Sarah Beth spend money before her pants catch fire
• Read my new book.... My Antonia....
• Blog
• Laundry
• Send mail to Kelly's parents in Kansas
• finish bible study homework
• make snack for bible study on Tuesday night
• Ministy meeting at 7PM
• Plan Girls Night Out

And, the dice roll.... how much will happen.... how much won't....

Rachael

Hey YOU!!
yes..... you there... staring at your computer screen... the visitors from far and away.... yes, I am talking to YOU!

This is the thing.

Everyone loves a blog.

We love to read them, we love to write them.

Are you visiting my blog?


My problem? What makes you think I have a problem? I just want to know you came by - want to know that you might come back again - that my life - or at least my life according to my own fifteen minutes of blog fame - is interesting - exciting - worth reading about. I find myself spending countless hours obsessing over blogs -reading my other favorite blogs (see my list below right) and catching up on the lives of people I have never even met. It's Disney style voyuerism in the finest American way... via the internet. So.... tell me you came by... post a comment, add me to your Blogroll... you know, let's be friends! Ok... I am looking forward to hearing from you.....

Girls finally in the bed... another exciting weekend. Actually, despite the constant arguing and bickering, it was rather refreshing to spend the weekend with them ... Dad has been clocking in for a while on the weekend thing. Lucky me.

Bought Jordin her new dance shoes on Saturday... involved MUCH bitching and moaning from me (though silently, of course) regarding purchasing a pair of Jazz shoes she can only wear for two or three months at the most before it's time for a new $48 pair of ugly tan leather booties. However, upon arriving at the dance apparel shop, Jordin spotted a teenage girl buying her first set of pointe shoes.... she was completely enchanted, making all of my $48 worthwhile.... well, at least it was a temporary bandaid. We also left with new $18 tights.

Drank margaritas with my friend Tina on Saturday night at Longhorn's.... ran over to Target to dash in and check out the blue jeans (on sale, thanks Katie Fleck... ) and picked up Jordin two new pairs of jeans and a clearance pair of pink T-strap shoes. ... hey, at $4.98 - I'll buy her anything. The pants, alas -are too big (@#@@#*&!), but the shoes are perfect.

Tomorrow - the girls are out of school - Jordin has a rehersal for her dance recital from 10-12 - Sarah Beth has $10.00 burning a fire the size of Texas in her pocket - and I want to go to the fabric store... of course, there is a church ministry meeting at seven - so, we'll see how much actually happens. Gotta return the too big pants - and of course the damn sale is over.

Drat.

Rachael

..the funny things Jordin says.....

So, I bake cookies.
I read "Family Fun" magazine... and try all the cute cupcake recipes.
I cut paper dolls, and dress them too.
I have a box to organize my extra ribbon.
I can cook a mean turkey for Thanksgiving.
I can fold napkins... know what a complete place setting of China looks like...

Apparently, all this has rubbed off on my children.

Friday at school, during discussion of the upcoming weeks of preschool...

Ms. Lisa: "We have a holiday on the 17th. You won't be at school on the 17th. Does anyone know why?"
(Jordin eagerly raises hand and proceeds to obnoxiously wave hand around in order to gain attention)
Ms. Lisa : "Yes, Jordin, what holiday is the 17th?"
Jordin : "It's Martha Stewart Day, Ms. Lisa."

I think it might be time for less cupcakes, and more American History.

Rachael

Dad's sweetheart 

Swollen nose and all.....
No worries everyone, I survived the day; though it has been a long one.

(yawn)

I was fortunate enough to blessed with some stronger than normal Tylenol medication this morning for the swollen knot that has become my nose. That helped. I went from not being able to feel anything but said swollen knot to being able to feel nothing, and I do mean nothing from the neck up. Beautiful. My favorite comment this morning at church was certainly the old favorite, "yes, your face does look really swollen."

Oh, thankyoueversomuch.

Jordin continues to ask if my nose is sore, though I have reassured her at least three million times that it's not her fault, and that it was an accident.

We had little Cassidy over for the afternoon to play - and considering the 71 degree weather we seem to have been fortunate enough to have, it was a gorgeous day for a playdate.

Bought two gallons of Martha Stewart "seedling" green today for the dining room. Can't WAIT to paint tomorrow.

Ciao -
Rachael

mommy abuse
ouch....

last night Jordin, whom I was picking up early from dad, threw her head back (you know, to be dramatic and swing her luxurious hair around) at the same time I was bending down to help her get her blue jeans buttoned..... her head hit my nose so hard I saw stars... literally. This morning, I feel like my face has been hit by a truck.... thank God it doesn't look like it... I think my nose is broken. Ouch. Anyone have an ice pack, something stronger than Alleve, and maybe a babysitter - so I can go lie back down? Jordin is quite the little nurse, however... maybe she won't try to be "luxurious hair nurse" today.

Saw Lemony Snicket last night... fabulous movie.

First Friday 2005...
And here we are.... at home.

Enjoying my favorite kind of Friday ... the kind where, reluctantly I send the girls off to Athens with Jim for the weekend, and I ramble around the house for a while. Spent an hour in Michaels - lots of cool ideas but NO spending... and, then decided to eat dinner while watching television. Now, I have found a Lifetime movie to entertain me.

Jim wants me to come to Athens tomorrow night and take the whole fam to the Lemony Snicket movie.... this means either

• a long day of driving - then bring the girls home post movie (more driving)
• or, spend the night in Athens
• or, just say no, can't make it this time.

(sigh)

It's hard when we've worked so hard to be friends and put the girls first always to say no... on the other hand, I HAVE to work on moving on. Doing things sans girls.... sans Jim.... I hate the thought of it.

Rachael

Attention Amber Frey ... please go home.
Setting Single Moms back ANOTHER 30 years....

(prepare for "vent" mode)

The Today Show (NBC).

Oprah.

I've just about seen enough, honey. Let me just start by telling you - God bless you. You are obviously a brave and strong woman to stand up and testify, essentially, in the name of a woman and infant you had or would never meet. I don't deny you your good health and fortune, nor do I think you should be called anyone's "mistress." And I sincerely mean that from the bottom of my heart.

Now. All that being said.

It's time to go home. Sell the book, make lots of money... pay your legal fees, buy a new car. Move away from California and build a new life. But please, Amber - go home. I have listened to your interviews with Matt and Oprah - and all I can do is stare in complete amazement... the stereotype that I try so hard to run from is sitting right in front of me. The stereotype that every single woman runs from is sharing her story with the world....

• You really slept with him on the first date?

... and you don't mind telling the world about it? Listen everyone... I had my first daughter when I was 17 - started dating AFTER my divorce when I was 23... everyone understands that these things happen - completely... but when asked WHAT you were thinking, WHY you felt you so comfortable as to go ahead and hop in the sack with the man?

".... well, he had been prescreened by my friend, Shane...."

"... I just felt I could trust him...."

are you kidding me? The DAY my friends start to prescreen men for me - the day I think that simply because my friend set me up it's ok??? Please, dear future tall, handsome man of mine: I am not a desperate woman. Trust you? I hope so.. but, you know -

• You let him pick up your child from school by the third date?

Ok, you trusted him. I get that. Really. However, this makes me cringe. I guess I am just way, way too protective of my girls. You are going through some serious relationship with me before you are picking up my children from school by yourself. They have a daddy already, thanks.

I hate it. I am here - waiting - patiently, mind you - for Mr. Right. I don't mind waiting. I have a checklist three miles long - hell, maybe I am "over" waiting... whatever... and the guys I have dated - wonderful. Fabulous. But these stereotypes of single moms... you know, desperate for affection, searching for a father for their children - they are killing women like me... ARRGG!! So, please Amber - pack it up and run on home, honey. Let the book do the talking, and you can just go back to leaving the rest of us single mom's be. Thanks.

And - single women everywhere - these things are signs that you should be asking questions... as Oprah so gracefully said yesterday - "things that make little pink flags start waving...."

1. only available by cell phone
2. has "water" running in the background every time you talk (Scott said this sound was "soothing" to him)
3. gives you his address to send him a card - to a PO box sixty miles from home
4. first tells you he's never been married, then that his wife is dead, then that his wife is only missing.

I feel MUCH better now.

Sunset  

Jim sent me the pictures of the girls from the beach trip last month... some of them are awesome, and I will post them for you...

Sarah on the beach...December 04 

Back in the Swing of Things
Well, that's it. Christmas and New Year's officially passed, and the girls returned to school on Tuesday. They had a wonderful time in Florida with Jim - and were almost as happy as I was when Tuesday morning arrived. I've finally recovered all living room from PHT (post holiday trauma) and am slowly, slowly getting laundry under control. As I was taking the girls things downstairs to their bedrooms, I realized just how much STUFF they actually have... too much. I think this week, while they're enjoying school, I'll slowly move some older goodies towards Goodwill. It's time, you know?
The girls are adjusting to my more present status in their daily routines. Before, while working sixty plus hours a week - we didn' t do much on the "family" time... I didn't even realize how much we depended on my parents (Mimi and Pa) to get us through the week. I saw them for an hour or so every morning, and the same or less in the evenings. Pa did breakfast, Mimi did homework, bathtime and supper - and I safely crossed home just in time for bedtime stories. Since having my "revelation," (you know, realizing I was tired of working sixty hours a week for people who less than didn't appreciate me and all the money I made them... but I am not bitter, really) I am :

• picking them up in the carpool line
• taking them to the library
• going to Matinee movies
• rollerskating (imagine - six foot tall mommy on rollerskates for the first time in at least ten years... )
• making bubble baths
• kissing the ouchies to make them feel better (ewww... not a glamorous job...)
• doing laundry (so, we have a few new pink shirts and a few less white ones.... )
• reading stories (yes, the voices too)
• coloring
• dressing Barbie (at least sixty times a day; does this mean my children are somewhat addicted to new clothes?)
• driving to dance lessons (where in the #&@^# is the missing ballet shoe???)

and the girls are simply amazed. I am not saying that to be vain at all... it's funny. They cannot believe I can do any of this stuff.... Sarah Beth now wears a watch to be sure we are going to make it anywhere on time, and Jordin .... well, she's just happy to go anywhere. I made dinner last night - you know, actually cooked a complete meal from scratch (which, they didn't complain about, mind you) and Jordin said to me, with eyes as wide as quarters... "Mommy! I didn't know you could cook!"

I love it. May I always be a source of complete amazement.

Have a good day!

Hi Tech Frustration

Things I want to do on my blog but can't figure out.... *@(#*@()#*~!!

• Add people to my "Blogroll," and actually have them appear on my blog
• Make a new, less "free-Blogger"esque template (oy, this would require me knowing HTML, hahaha.... that was maniacal laughter.... I was married, after all, to the King of the Internet for three and a half years.... where is all that now?)
• Have a photoblog somewhere else besides my blog
• Do that cool "strike-thru" thing that all the cool blogs I read have

.... well, the list continues, but not to bore anyone to pieces. Maybe I will go and dust off my library card today and check out an HTML book. Hmmm... if anyone "stopping by" from anywhere in the world has any ideas... PLEASE! I am pulling out my single mom card and waving it around... HELP!!

Beach Bums
The girls arrived home safely from the beach trip at about 9:30... Jim kept sunscreen on them, so they came home unscathed from the sun... however, neither one had brushed their teeth or hair in a few days... ugh. Sound asleep with many adventures to report. More tomorrow. Enjoy the pictures... we have a new scanner!

Look how much the girls have grown... Summer 2003 

Jim and the Girls Thanksgiving 04 

Girls Christmas Photo 2004 

Sarah Beth's 8th Birthday 11.11.04 

Jordin chatting with dad....  

a day well spent, indeed....
(a day in the life of a single mom when the kids are away)

6:00 AM - Body clock briefly wakes me up... realize that because there are no kids home, there are also not seven night lights on throughout... darkness prevails. Turn over and go back to sleep.

9:00 AM - Wake up again. Smell brewed coffee from pre-set coffee maker. Realize there is no one to make breakfast for... turn over and go back to sleep.

11:00 AM - Wake up again. Smell old coffee. This is getting ridiculous. Drag self out of bed as if it's 6:00 AM. Decide that PopTarts do NOT sound good for breakfast. Make scrambled eggs and sausage... realize no one is complaining about no PopTart rule. Enjoy quiet breakfast watching CNN. Still, hear no complaints from AWOL Peanut Gallery.

12:30 PM - Check email in pajamas.

1:30 PM - Take shower. Think to self - I should probably do SOMETHING productive today. Go upstairs to craft supplies. Get out photographs and seperate. Become stingy about what photos to give to Jim.

2:00 PM - Dry hair and get dressed. Sit down on bed to put on socks. Realize - bed is not made, no children to supervise. Turn on TV. Watch COPS marathon. Realize - my life is not really that bad after all.

2:30 PM - Doze off in warm, unmade bed. No one comes to wake me up with insane question about anything.

3:00 PM - Wake up - panic briefly that day is wasting away. Clean out car completley. Gather change and extra $2.00 found in car and go get lunch. Eat and watch more "grown up" tv.

4:00 - 7:00- Work on craft projects like scrapbooking and etc. . Think about New Year's resolutions.

7:00-8:00 - Chat with parents. Eat dinner with parents who have brought me leftovers from lunch with friends. Yummy. Have dessert with dad. He made Fried Pies. Yummy.

8:00-10:30 - Finish craft projects. Help mom look up something cool on the net.

10:30-present - Blog.

New Years Day....
New Years Day 2005. The girls are away at the beach with Jim - he's at the Outback Bowl today... the girls I am sure are torturing their "other" grandparents... You know, these are the grandparents that see the girls about once or twice a year, and then only when Jim himself initiates the visit. So, I am sure they are completely deluged with a million and four questions, not to mention Jordin's usual show of whining and crying when around someone she feels she can manipulate... Sarah Beth I am sure, has not slowed her usual million question a day rate for the two of them, and I am positive both have complained about at least a meal or two.

Jordin left last week promising to return home to share her adventures.... "well," she added, "at least the ones I don't forget..." This clears her of any reponsibility when I ask them about their week, and the only thing they can muster about a week long visit to Grandad's fabulous beach house on the crystal clear shores of southern Florida is.... "I can't remember."

As for me - I spent last night with close friends, watching a couple of Lifetime movies, eating, and relaxing in the hot tub. Eating is not so bad, however, relaxing in a hot tub or watching Lifetime movies - especially the combination of both - is detremental for a single person who is decidedly tired of being single.... watching Lifetime movies is like sheer torture - all of which end with the perfect love story ending - you know, lost loves reunited despite horrible and strange, often decades long periods of seperation, or - the inevitable chance meeting of soulmates on a busy subway or street... and yet I continue to wait.... and, the hot tub idea... yikes... I'll pass next time on the warm relaxing hot tub experience with my sweet and dear friends who were celebrating their eigth wedding anniversary last night.... it was almost like a Lifetime movie... here we are - sharing our anniversary with our sweet, poor single friend Rachael.

My New Year's Resolution this year?? Well, there's a list of em', baby - but, at the top - to find that peaceful feeling that reminds me that it's ok - that someday, somewhere - I am sure to meet "him," and be a part of something for the rest of my life. That's my resolution. Yeah, yeah, it sounds really cheesy and storybook - but it's truly what I seek. I hate the panic feeling that sets in when I think about being single for the rest of my life.... it's scary. Maybe this year I can at least drop the panic thing - work on the rest some other time.

Happy New Year to you and yours -
Rachael

UPDATE - Just spoke to the girls, they can't wait to come home, even though they've had a wonderful time. I am so glad. :-) I've missed them.