Quote of the Day

The reason Dorothy got lost in Oz was because three men were giving her directions. -Anonymous

Merry Everything.

(or, Christmas with the Fletchers, 2004)

Oh, the joys of single motherhood.

December Calendar...

1st through 8th - do nothing special and spend time with family, say for the fifteenth time, "...this year, I am not going to make myself crazy over the holidays...."

8th through 10th - realize that there is only approximately 15 days until Christmas, yet no shopping has been completed... but, it's really ok because, "...this year, I am not going to make myself crazy over the holidays..."

10th through 12th - go out "after hours" (you know, past bedtime) and try to shop for girls Christmas gifts... become annoyed VERY quickly with mass amounts of people shopping at the same time....

13th through 15th - breathe a sigh of Christmas relief. Complete list of gifts for girls narrowed down, locations of gifts found, all withing reasonable single mom budget. Praise self for being organized and sensible.

16th - make detremental trip to WalMart; see many many things on the girls list; get a buggy and start shopping. Completely blow budget and list out the window.

16th through 17th - remain in denial about the mass amounts of stuff purchased.

18th - Have dinner with oldest and dearest friend. Girl talk. Therapy. Realize how much I have missed her, and how much "history" we have.

19th - Ex husband calls, unsolicited, to say that he plans to split cost of way too many Christmas gifts with me. Self imposed guilt. Be dishonest about amount spent, and be glad for half of that. Sister and I mutually agree to exchange hugs this year for our gifts - we both blew too much $$ on other stuff. Exchange hugs.

20th through 23rd - celebrate all of my mom's holidays - birthday and anniversary. Remain in denial about number of packages to wrap. Drop girls off with Jim.

24th - Start panic mode early. Call Jim in panic mode. Tell him we can't spend the night there because of panic mode. Receive supportive phone call from Jim's mom. Calm down.

Have conversation with Jim. Realize that he didn't buy me anything for Christmas, despite my well thought out gifts for him. Hang up. Call back. Make him promise to NOT buy me anything today, in desperation. He promises.

Work from 12-6. Leave work, rush home, pack car and overnight bag. Arrive at Jim's mom's. Feed girls, bathe girls, break up small fight, tell them I hear Santa outside - put girls to bed. Realize I left all family gifts at home. Watch movie with Jim. Fall asleep on sofa.

Surviving Christmas....
No worries - the girls and I survived the holidays with Jim... it actually turned out to be fun... ok, well - as fun as fun can be when spending the favorite holiday of the year with my former in laws and husband. The girls are away at the beach now with their dad - so, I am busy painting and being my very own home improvement show.... more to come about the holidays....

Rachael

Wednesday.

My mom's 48th birthday.

The girls and I are painting today at the house... I got paint for a Christmas present from Santa (I think only adults get excited about things like paint for Christmas).... I am painting the walls a really light blue, the fireplace a really light green - and the trim and ceiling white. Don't worry - I thought the same thing when I heard about that possible color scheme - but it looks great. I think we'll finish the hardwood floors with a dark cherry kind of stain.

After my room, we still have much to accomplish. The living room has to be painted and carpeted, the dining room has to be painted (leaving that flooring for now), kitchen painted and countertops and cabinets replaced, bathroom finished (this is my dad's project - it could be a while) and the girls room - painted and carpeted. It seems like a lot more when I write it down than it does to actually see it... it's still overwhelming. A little at a time is the best I can do. Not to mention the emotional overwhelming I feel everytime I am up there.... I miss my Aunt Vera. A lot. Especially at Christmas.

Photos with the "former spouse" (Jim) and family went well yesterday. The girls looked adorable, and I took some great pictures. Of course, Jim took the film from me to develop it (whatever, as long as he wants to pay for it).... Susan (Jim's mom) took us out to lunch afterwards at the Pizza Construction Company in almost Vinings. It was great... she is precious and I love to spend time with her. I think she was happy about the photos as well. She likes "family" things like that. We'll see her again on Friday - since I decided to "share" the girls with Jim this Christmas. Aren't I nice? Let's just hope it all goes as peachy as planned.

We Three Things.....

Three names you go by
Rachael
Rach
Rachie

Three screennames you have:
Rach
sbsmommie
Rachael (yes... boring)

Three things you love about yourself
(oh, they are few....)
having long hair (for once in my life)
um
ok... we'll come back to this later...

Three things you dislike about yourself
(oh - good - this is my strongpoint!!)
weight gain (yuck)
"mommy" hips
my shoe size

Three parts of your heritage
( I only know two for sure)
Welsh
American Indian

Three things that scare you
spiders (of any size/description/color)
anything bad happening to my family or friends
not having a job (ooohhh... this sounds familiar)

Three of your everyday essentials
Jergens Cherry Almond scented moisturizing lotion
Coffee
Quiet Time

Three things you are wearing RIGHT now
My scarf I knitted (yay me, I love to knit!)
Gap Blue jeans (my favorite pair, even though they make me look huge)
socks

Three of your favorite bands/artists of the moment
Summerland (Baby Girl... turn it up and sing!)
Third Day (Christian group... except, they are HOT, as Paris would say)
Kelly Clarkston (can't help it, I love her)

Three of your favorite songs at present
Baby Girl (...dear mom and dad please send money)
Broken Road
Baby it's Cold Outside (though, any version BESIDES Nick and Jessica)


Three things you want to try in the next twelve months
having my own business
taking the girls on a SERIOUS vacation, bymyself
going somewhere completely crazy ... just me!

Three things you want in a relationship (love is a given)
Trust
Committment
Respect
(oh, dear - that sounds canned, doesn't it?)

Two truths and a lie
I love cold weather... brrr!!
I want to live on a farm one day - with lots of horses and land.
I think it's great being single.... HAHAHAHAHA!!

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeal to you
Hands
Eyes
Smile

Three things you just can't do
finish anything on time
be anywhere on time
clean anything in a timely manner

Three of your favorite hobbies
Taking pictures (photography)
Scrapbooking
Writing

Three things you want to do badly right now
Finish reading my latest book (wicked... the life and times of the wicked witch of the west)
Finish knitting SB's scarf
Call Jim and ask him where the &@#*@& the pictures are I took this morning

Three careers you're considering
Wedding/Event planner
Full time, stay at home momma (yeah, right... I can't see that happening anytime soon)
Owning my own business... (shhh...)

Monday.

Oy. The girls are home (finally) this morning - and I am so happy. Had a wonderful dinner with my dearest and oldest friend, Kelly on Saturday - and I would have to write a whole post about that just do barely do it justice. Working a lot (yuck, I hate retail) - and can't wait till Christmas. Today, Jim asked me to be in his family picture... :-) Nice. More later.

Rachael

Friday.

Girls are getting ready for a weekend with dad... thank goodness - I am ready for a break... not that I don't love them - but, I've had them since October without a break. That's a long time. This weekend, Daddy can answer all the questions (and oh, there are many) tell all the stories, tie all the shoes, fix all the "crumpled" socks (anal retentive children), "straighten" all the covers, referee all the arguments, and zip all the sweaters and coats. He can make sure the tights match, the cupcakes are the same size, decide whose turn it is to choose the tv show, dress all the barbies, put back together all the pieces, get them to the next level on the Gameboy, and spread all the PB&J.

I think he's built up a few months of that... don't you?

And me?

Well.... I'll sleep later than seven every morning - fix breakfast for only myself and share it with no one, spread out in my bed and hog all the covers, read a complete chapter (even a sentence) of my latest book without being interrupted, buy myself Reese's cups - and not share them with anyone - see a movie with a rating more risque than PG.... I can meet my grown up friends late at night for coffee - stay up as late as I want too - go for long walks bymyself in the park....

... and then, by Sunday - I am sure to be miserable and ready for my two shadows to come home.....


Rach

Tuesday.

Last day of school for the girls before Christmas Break.

The format of my blog might be changing a few times over the next few days; I found a really great template I want to use - just have to get Jim to help me set it all up... yes, sadly - Jim is helping me. That's ok though.

Got the girls off to school today on time - which, in case you are wondering is an accomplishment every time it actually happens. Both had their school Christmas parties today - mom took breakfast (biscuits and sausage) to SB's class, and I am going back at ten for Jordin's party... yikes- that means a shower, lipstick and good hair before ten... wow. Talk about accomplishments.

Their visit this week with Jim was of course great... as it usually is. Susan (Grammy; Jim's mom) picked both up from school on Tuesday - and they met Jim at her house. He and SB studied for her language arts test, and then they went out to Chuck E. Cheese for a while. They came home sometime after eight - both exhausted and ready for bed. I am sure that they had a fabulous time - but it drives me mad that he didn't bring them home, on a school night, till almost eight-thirty. Anyway, he stayed around and did the bedtime routine with me - which is good - because, it's hard to think up a new story to tell every single night of the week. So, Daddy told the stories. We talked afterwards about our calendar for the Christmas break - since this is literally the only time he sees them for days at a time - it's important to the girls - and I want to make sure it happens for them. He's open to having them quite a bit over the break, and even taking them to the beach house for the last week of December.

(sigh..... two things to miss about being married into the Fletcher family - the beach house and the mountain house.... oh well. .... )

There are only about three million posts I want to have time to write - but, finding the time to sit down and just type away is rare. So, I will whittle away at my list - and hope for the best.
I hope you enjoy reading - and, hope you enjoy the new format, once it finally shows up.

Rachael

Sarah Beth and Jordin, December 2004 

 

Dance Class/December 2004 Amanda, Jordin and Lexi 

Jordin's 5th Birthday at preschool 

Jordins "bestfriendinthewholewideworld" Mary Ashlee Wittenmore... daughter of Christy Poss....  

Jordin.... Cinderella waiting on her prince 

Email status... none.

Anyway - today is Monday - lovely Monday. The girls and I had a famously (in the spirit of SB's very British teacher) good week end (another British thing) and - we all got to school on time this morning... amazing. On Friday - we had the Bethlehem dinner, and then I made a visit to the fabulous digs at the Cobb County Adult Detention Center (politically correct for, "jail." WHAT? What in the &#&$#^ was I, dear Rachael - doing IN such a despicable place? Well. ... more on that later - and more on the comments posted o the previous post.... there's always a story behind everything, you know?

Gotta pick up SB from school....


Rachael

No return email yet - for those of you who are paying attention... but you know, I did without expectation of one... it still sucks, though.....

Is this an addiction when I am up at 1 AM typing?
Friday - much done. I finished the girls Christmas shopping this morning - I just need to pick up the rest of the goodies for SB's knitting basket ... Jordin is going to get everything she asked for except for one crazy toy I swear the child made up. Couldn't find that anywhere - and not too stressed about it, either. I even found SB the charger she needed to replace for her Gameboy SP, which should make her happy - considering she's "lost" the last four or so that we've had.

Tonight was the "Bethlehem" supper at mom and dad's church. Dressed the girls in matching Christmas sweaters (only cuter) and off we went. VERY crowded. They had live sheep, goats, and a llama (for goodness sake, do you really think a Llama was present at the nativity)....

Friday .... girls were late to school this morning - barely picked them up on time... off to Bethlehem dinner and Nativity at mom's church.. girls wearing matching Christmas sweaters.... cute!!

Oy vey. Classmates.com will only lead to trouble. It's true.

So, you know - I am reading the little small town Dallas New Era last week (you know, THE place to be seen here in lovely small town Georgia) and I see this annoucement for the ten year class reunion for the 1995 high school class. SO. I think:
WOW.
How old are we?
Just think Rach, in two years - I'll be going to such.
Yikes.
Wow.
Things change, don't they?
So - I am thinking ALLLLL these things and the deadly thought comes into my head that I should email my high school semi-sweetheart (only "semi" because we only dated for like, a year and a few months - other than that, my total high school sweetheart) and tell him that his reunion is about to happen. I mean, I think he doesn't live here - but, you know - I am only guessing that - as every single friend I ever see asks me how he is... HELLO... I married someone else... anyway... so - I was thinking a nice thought. A do a good deed thought.

So.

I sent him an email through Classmates.com. You know - it was just nice. Hi, how are you, I am still here in town, everyone asks about you, if you want the class reunion stuff tell me and I will send it. Yadda yadda yadda. I even included two (2) :-)'s.

So, you know... I get this email today that he's read my email. HE READ THE EMAIL. Mind you, he was never supposed to actually read it.. I was just supposed to send it and never know if he READ it.. but, apparently Classmates is nice enough to inform you of these things via email... I now have knots in my stomach and feel like I am suddenly sixteen again - you know, reverting back to those days of no responsibility and ... ok - well, I was a BIT of a princess, but you know... I am just bothered that he read it - not bothered in a bad way - just well, what if he's thinking I am crazy or forlorn, or something awful. What if he's laughing because I sent it? What if, what if, what if. I even went back and reread the email to make sure it was totally neutral. I am sure it was.

And let me just tell you... after almost ten years and being married and two children later - I was madly in love with this boy. It took me MOVING away from home to finally get over it and move on with my life. MOVING, I tell you. I doubt he felt the same way about me - considering my "level of goody-goody and princess like behavior", but - I should have left well enough alone. Just - left it right where it was. Maybe.

On the complete other side of the insane psychoanalytical (oooohh... I REALLLY hope I spelled that big word correctly) Rachael, it was fun to send him an email. And, I am sure that my intentions were only read as sincere. I mean, let's hope so.

Hmmm. I think I have to go and call Jim now or something... he has a way with bringing back to reality -or, he could just totally piss me off and that would do it too.. did I mention that he's showing up here next week to pick up the girls and take them to Chuck E Cheese? ARRGG!! I hate DisneyDad. He's much better on a consistent basis.

I have to go and look through the "high school box" now.

So - the moral of this story - stay away from those classmate reuniting places. Just kidding. Just don't send emails.

Rachael

It's 10:45. Just got home from doing some Christmas shopping. I had this epiphany a few hours ago that Christmas was only two weeks away and I had not bought the first gift... oops! This is the first year that, since I am not working like a crazy person, I don't feel crazy about shopping. It's not that I have a humbug thing - you know, I just am not in the mood to get out there and join the masses as the dive into debt ... all for one day. Anyway - so, I forced myself to go out and at least start looking for ideas. If you think shopping as married parent is hard - try being single. Usually, I recruit one the male personas (and, you know - that's all they are unfortunately - personas) to go with me, but not this year. This year I braved the mall alone.

Jordin made request for a "princess-shirt-with-all-the-princesses-on-it" (if you say it very, very fast you get the full effect) so - I found that at the Disney store... And, after I gazed at all the snowglobes that were on sale for $39.99, and reverted BACK to my teenage obsession with them.. oh yes - the shirt..wow.. GREAT sale! The shirts were only %5.99 - so you know, I bought SB one too - only she is NOT wearing anything relating to royalty (I swear she's going to be my hippie tree hugging child) so - she got an "Incredibles" one. I could have bought them everything RIGHT then and there - all the dress up, all the action figures - it was BOGO HEAVEN. But - alas - I knew I had bigger fish to fry. Jordin also wants some Aladdin/Jasmine toy that talks - which I could not find in the Disney store... if not in the Disney store, then WHERE??

(When SB was little, she thought the Disney store WAS Disneyworld - so, according to her, she went to Disneyworld like, every week... much to the amazement of all her preschool buddies. )

Then, I rambled through GapKids - as SB is the resident clotheshorse. I don't know about you - but I used to get REALLY mad when I opened a box and it was clothes... not SB; she LOVES it! She told me the other night when we were shopping for shoes that some of them "just weren't her style..." Oh, really.. then, praytell, dear child of mine, what is your style? "A little sassy," she said. Oh my goodness. Did MY child just tell me she's a little sassy? Yes indeed. So - I looked at a million different things - some WAY cool suede boots with flowers on them - skirts, glitter blue jeans, ponchos - only to wander out aimlessly.
Old Navy however - was more promising.... you know, you gotta have a 50% off sign to get my attention. So, two matching velour jumpsuits, two pairs of track pants and two fleece pullovers later (oh yes - and some socks too) I walked out happy. Yay. By this time - I am fading fast - and the stupid people in the mall are beginning to annoy me.

One last stop in Borders - bought SB a knitting guide... I think I will fix her a basket of supplies to go along with it... you know, needles, yarn and etc. . I sat and read and compared two books for like, an hour... and then left. Oh yeah - found my mom a GREAT book on raising orchids (oh yes, her thing) on the sale table for... well.. I am not telling how cheap my mom's perfect gift was....

I'll have to post tomorrow about SB's one request for Christmas - it's sure to break your heart. Or, well - maybe not so much break your heart, but you know - it's heartwarming.

Ok. I am officially modern. I know, I know - you've been waiting. Well, lucky you. Your wait is over... I have a blog.

Blog noun [short for Weblog] (1999) : a Web site that contains an online personal journal with reflections, comments, and often hyperlinks provided by the writer

If you know me - then you know I love to write. Anyway - now you can keep up with my daily adventures (ok - most will be boring) and the girls (who everyone wants to know about anyway).

:-) I miss all of you! I hope that you are ALLLL doing fabulously well - please keep in touch!


MY BLOG!!/

Love
Rachael
(and the girls)

(ps - Kristi - got your email from Kell - hope you don't mind - loved your site - congrats on Jonathan - he's beautiful!! Tracy - same story - love you too!! )

LOTS of pictures posted tomorrow!! ;-) Be sure to check back in!

This is the article Jim sent me about the holidays.... ok, I get it - we're not the Cleavers -but, we manage....

The girls and I had a wonderful day... Jordin was in the bed with me EARLY this morning... Sarah Beth (must lie in her bed and worry for two hours before it's time to wake up about whether or not she WILL wake up with the alarm clock...) woke us all up on time (she loves that...) and we had oatmeal and bacon for breakfast... Everyone got to school on time too. I am really getting good at the mommy thing....

This afternoon SB and I dropped off Jordin at dance - and went to her favorite place to shop - the Dollar Tree. I gave her two dollars - and she was in heaven. After a good hour of debating over which treasures she wanted - she chose some ridiculous jumping beans and a stuffed puppy. Of course, she wanted to spend her money buying a small angel for the tree - but, I told her that I thought Mimi's angel would be perfect... (it's like a little Christmas book - SB and her desire to share her wealth with everyone but herself)... We headed home for homework ("sums") and I cleaned out my car. The revelation here is, for the past year and a half of working 60 hours a week - my life has been RATHER disorganized... so, a clean car is a miracle.

We went back to pick up Jordin at dance and watched the girls reherse their number for the Festival of Trees this weekend... oh my goodness - adorable costumes - they look like little peppermints - and, then we had to run to Wal Mart (oh the insanity) to get a baby gift and SB new tennis shoes. SB volunteered her birthday gift card to pay for her tennis shoes - so I let her pick the kind she wanted. Jordin and I picked out the baby gift (look for pictures tomorrow) - we always "make" the gift - so, we chose some pieces and then came home. By this time, despite an early supper, they were starving - so, each had a PB&J and then found their own thing to do... for SB, this means my lap... and for Jordin - well, an hour later I found her in full dress up gear, complete with makeup.... It was a wonderful day.

Jim and I decided that instead of me spending Christmas with the girls exclusively this year, we are all (yes, me, Jim, and the girls) going to spend the night at his mom's house on Christmas Eve. He sent me this article he read online the other day - you know, as if to seal the "we're really not that disfunctional" mantra.

I don't really mind so much, spending the holiday with him. He's good with all the putting together of the Christmas stuff -and, the girls love it. After all this time, when you ask the girls to tell you about their "family," or ask them to "draw a picture of your family," they are always drawing the four of us. Jordin once told a friend at school that her mom and dad were "best friends," which I thought was sweet, considering what some kids of divorced parents must say. I don't know about "best friends," but we try hard for the girls to maintain some sort of peaceable experience for their sake.

I hear these awful stories of divorce all the time - and even remember that shortly after Jordin was born, when Jim and I were married, he was actually "concerned" about his parents being in the same room together when coming to see her. I never want the girls to think of us that way. So, Jim sent me an article about divorced families spending the holidays together - you know, the attorney in him (God Bless him) had to provide the "supporting documents" to justify our activities together.... oh well... can't say that I blame him there. I'll keep you posted.

Wow... another month over.

Sarah Beth and Jordin both celebrated their birthdays this month - each another year older. SB turned eight (I cannot belive I have an eight year old daughter) on the 11th of November, and Jordin turned five on the 30th. They are so much taller than I remembering them being only yesterday - and I think time is going by at a speed far beyond my control.

Sarah Beth. Every mom thinks their children are beautiful. I am certainly no exception. If you know them, then you know everyone thinks SB is a little Rachael... her mannerisms, her long legs... her ability to argue with a Stop sign... all very me. I cherish this about her. Everyday, sadly enough, I look at her and see her being less and less of my baby and best friend - and more of her own person - graceful and elegant and simply dancing through life. She is the writer - the creator - the artist. She keeps little diaries in notebooks she finds - there must be at least fifty of them in her room... she writes stories - journals her day to day life (note: according to one journal, I am "mean"; can't blame her for being honest). She tells me often that one day, she will be a "popular" (i.e., famous) author. For some reason, I have no doubts. Our relationship has always been special - more of best friends than mom and daughter... something she and I figure out more about each day we are together. A second grader - her teacher is from Wales, and SB has discovered she can speak very "good British."

Jordin. SO much a Fletcher. She is truly her "daddy's girl," and proudly proclaims it to anyone who stops to listen. She looks like him, moves like him, and even acts like him on occasion. She epitomizes everything Jim, in very female form. Jordin is the dancer - the drama queen, and the lover. She's the owner of the little feet you hear coming across your floor at four in the morning, looking for the warm place in the bed next to mommy. She's the kisser, the hugger, and the total diva. For some reason, I always encouraged Jordin to be herself... right down to wearing a tutu and plastic shoes to the grocery. She could care less about what anyone thinks - very self confident, that one. She's in preschool for the last time this year - next year she'll grace the halls of McGarity with her charms....

New pictures from the bday soon!

Rachael

Can you believe how much the girls have grown? Jordin, age two - Sarah Beth, age five 

Just Becca and I... :-)  

My new favorite place to buy fabric for the girls... :-) Thanks Katey!

The new pictures below are from a picnic at Dobbins AFB, here in Atlanta - given for the families of service men and women from active reserve units stationed overseas in Kuwait. Our church staffed the event, serving lunch, painting faces, playing games, and entertaining everyone. It was a wonderful day - and certainly reminded us all of how much we miss Jon Hamilton!! (those are HIS precious babies you see!!)

This is a great article about my church family... grab some tissues!!

Lighthouse Christian Fellowship

Chris Hamilton 

Little Miss Abby Hamilton 

Baby Brayden.... precious. 

Wayne.... soon realized he might have made a fashion "don't" for church on Sunday....  

Volunteer T Shirts from Dobbins Picnic 

Sarah Beth - Ballet (isn't she pretty... must have her mommy's legs.....) 

Jordin, age 4, Downtown Dance Recital 2004, tap dance - "Muppet Babies...." 

Sarah Beth, age 7 Downtown Dance Recital 2004, "Shake Your Groove Thing...:"