"The Club"
and other politically incorrect activities

What do you suppose is the fascination with children and things they shouldn't do? Why, for example, must Sarah Beth insist on running through mud puddles and soaking her shoes, when I have asked her at least a bazillion times not to? Why must Jordin insist on doing "luxurious hair move" (i.e., tossing head back to flip mane of hair around to back) even though she has already almost broken my nose while doing so? Why?

Sarah Beth and Jordin have a new favorite place to play. And, if you haven't guessed already from the previous paragraph... it ain't makin' momma too happy. Granted, it's their favorite place in the world - the only place where some sort of sisterhood utopia must exist, as they can play for hours there and never raise a voice at each other..... it's affectionately dubbed, "The Club."

Dying to know where "the club" is? Well... right on the banks of the creek behind my house. It appears that an old tree's branches are growing towards the ground, making a perfect little cave between the trunk and the branches, just on the creekbank. We have toted dolls there, barbies, dress up clothes, and even snacks. Blankets, pillows, cups, and even Hunter on occasion.

Now, when I was little, playing in the creek was no big deal. I would be down there for hours at a time.. hours. I would slip off my shoes, slide down the bank, and land in the creek. After investigating all the animal prints on the side of the bank, and chasing away any and all wildlife (included, but not limited to water spiders, misc bugs and insects, the occasional raccon, etc) I would then tromp up and down until bored. This was a favorite past time. Of course, I was also allowed to ride my bicycle to the end (THE END 1.25 miles) of my road by myself. I was also allowed to dress up in actual "scary" Halloween costumes... also, I was allowed to "win" a softball game with my team. Whoa.

Something about my own children dancing down the creek bank disturbs me. I mean, what about scary snakes and BIG spiders? Has anyone thought about the quality of that water? And, are there bobcats down there waiting to make their afternoon snack out of my children? What if an eColi virus strain is traveling through the creek? What if Jordin thinks it's funny to drink the creek water? WHAT IF?!!!?? Jordin told me the other day that on the first trip to "the club," that apparently "the mommy dear was really scared when we got there so she just ran away to find another place to maybe take a nap or something." WHAT?? A LIVE ANIMAL?

I mean listen, we had mommies here at the Easter Egg Hunt that were flat out appalled that my kids were allowed to run around barefoot in the yard. These of course, were the same SUV driving mommies who had a strange fear of parking in grass. Weird. Anyway.

I ask you... what has changed in the twenty or so years that I was a kid? Why are my children forbidden to mention "the club" in my presence? Why does Sarah Beth think I am completely lame for not letting her play there? Why are the bicycle rides only a story I can tell? (calm down, people, there will be no riding outside of the driveway) Why don't I let them dress up in scary Halloween costumes? And, why, WHY can there be no official "winner" at the soccer games? All of the above just seems icky now... especially the thought of the girls playing anywhere near the creek. I guess in the years since my childhood, the danger of drowning or something else awful has just increased. That has to be it. But, I can assure you - if it gets too quiet over here, and the girls are no where to be found... stand on the back porch and yell their names... you WILL hear rustling down by the creek... and see the two of them come dashing to the house, each one screaming that the other one 'made me do it.'

Oy vey. Raising kids is hard... especially politically correct kids.